Star Battles Sex Positions
Star Wars Sexual intercourse Positions
Turning Star Wars вЂ” the most popular film franchise of all time вЂ” into comedy used to be sacrilege in some circles. But after Seth GreenвЂ™s popular animated series Robot Chicken took aim at the beloved meta-universe (with George LucasвЂ™ approval, no less), itвЂ™s suddenly acceptable.
In keeping with the tradition of spoofing Star Wars, and in honour of IGNвЂ™s massive rollout of the Top 100 Star Wars Characters, we present to you our Star Wars sex positions, for the fan base that doesnвЂ™t have sex. An exercise in futility? You tell us. Oh, and may the force be with you.
1- Jabba the Butt
We totally get that naming a Star Wars sex position after this slimy super-slug may not be the brightest thought, but he had been one of typically the most lustful character types in Star Wars history вЂ” as well as we at AskMen just canвЂ™t avoid a good juga. Warning: Try not necessarily to envision Jabba the Hutt although performing this shift.
First, it may be your job to be able to sit straight up flat in addition to extend your existing legs to generally the foot inside the bed while your sweetheart turns around in addition to straddles you. When she lowers himself onto your build penis and expands her legs again so they really are practically and you are out of the room, she could slide up in addition to down, giving an individual an incredible look at of her rear end. For added result, make her use a gold sting bikini during foreplay.
2- Hand Solo
Contrary to what you could be thinking, this Star Wars sex place doesnвЂ™t involve an individual pleasuring yourself personally (that would end up being a task, not a new position). Han Solitary was one typically the galaxyвЂ™s most famous playboys before settling lower with Leia. He or she most certainly never ever had to flog the dolphin (he probably got a new Twi’lek slave woman to obtain for him), why should an individual? Instead, have your current lady give an individual a five-finger orgasmic pleasure by cupping your current balls with a single hand and moving her other palm along your lightsaber in a corkscrew motion. Just make sure she uses lubricant (or saliva).
3- The Force
In the Star Wars universe, The Force is a spiritual energy field developed by all dwelling beings. It offers typically the power to boost natural physical in addition to mental abilities, this means you will manifest itself by means of telekinesis, telepathy, a hypnotic approach, enhanced empathy, in addition to precognition. Throw that all into the garbage. This specific position is just about all about sex together with, you guessed that, force (get that? ). Truth be told, difficult sex is actually a female sex fantasy. Relax her onto her again, place her thighs on your shoulder muscles and use your entire force to merely pound away. Also the lesser-endowed will certainly have her suspended in midair. This is the way Yoda gets this on too вЂ” trust us.
We have 3 more Star Wars sex positions, 2 of that will ruin annoying charactersвЂ¦